Alright ladies and gents, it’s time to blow those mind noodles into more fragments than that chocolate bar from the original Wonka flik. Or if you’d prefer, a wilder trip than the one taken by Gene Wilder himself!
In any case this author will no longer digress.
So without further ado – down the rabbit hole we go!
(read with an open mind and you’ll do just fine)
This author was raised under the umbrella of the Protestant faith – Presbyterian to be exact. Long story short, we never got along.
Well the kiddies at Sunday Skewl ostracized and alienated the little bugger who grew up to share these words with the world at large.
Although at the time, the boy couldn’t figure out why the world rejected him.
Looking back on it, this author realizes that an inherently dysfunctional pattern will only produce more problems than solutions.
Well that seems fairly reasonable!
After all, a cancerous tumor more than likely won’t revert back to its original state of not existing!
But alas, this is not the case. For a tumor will only continue to produce cells at unchecked rates to the point systems begin to shut down as dominoes fall before their tipper.
So what is this dysfunctional pattern the author speaks of?
The Holy Trinity.
At least in the eyes of those who propagate its message throughout the world at large.
For you see, most Christians would consider this Trinity to consist of a Father, a Son, and a Holy Spirit of some sort.
Well let’s think about that for a second.
Two men and a ghost.
Sounds like a sitcom!
Now this author isn’t a mathematician because he was raised in the US and attended the public school system – so needless to say, he is not a mathematician.
However, this author can confidently add 1+1 to obtain 2.
(a third factor that resides beyond the original set of numbers)
Likewise this author understands that it takes a mommy and a daddy to make a baby.
In other words, fathers don’t have sex with ghosts to make sons.
Now worry not because this author isn’t about to discuss the birds and the bees!
Well those animals really aren’t relevant at this time, though we’ll eventually discuss them because nature is awesome.
Back to sex.
A father requires a mother’s egg and her womb to manifest a child, and this of course happens when he mutually adds his sperm to the equation.
Now this child is a lot like a pie at first in that it would behoove one to leave it in the oven for the allotted baking time without prematurely exposing it to the outer world.
Otherwise problems associated with uncooked dough and cold innards tend to complicate the meal when it’s being served.
But worry not because this author isn’t endorsing one to cannibalize their offspring.
Quit the contrary!
This author was raised by monsters, and he was always made to believe that
he < Gawd (Jehova), family
Less than for those of you who, like the author writing these words, lacks a higher degree in mathematics.
So the boy always felt shameful, guilt-ridden, and just poopy most of the time.
But then again, he was raised by monsters.
Church wasn’t his saving grace either because it mistakenly placed all of the power in the hands of male figures like Jehova.
Ya know, the same deity who abused both Cain and Job?
Oh but he’s a loving father who is all-good, all-knowing, and omnipotent!
Well is he?
Just think about it for a second by taking the time to step outside the preconceived notions you’ve always known to be true.
Would a loving god shame his creation for not offering enough resources?
Of course this author is alluding to the moment when Jehova ridiculed Cain in front of a relative.
A child in the eyes of the father – made to feel < (less than) his brother Abel.
Cain killed Abel.
It most certainly did escalate quickly!
However, it’s important to discuss how Jehova responded to Cain’s action.
Ya see – Jehova further belittled his creation before cursing him to live out a wretched existence without experiencing anything heavenly for the rest of time.
Sounds like love…ugggh I guess?
Well some might look at that and think it was a just punishment coming from an authority figure.
This author would argue that Cain never would have felt the need to kill his brother out of jealousy, had Jehova not shamed him from the start.
At the very least Jehova could have waited for Abel to leave before sitting with Cain to encourage his growth and development.
I.e. Thanks for existing because I know you technically don’t have to, so you get a gold star for trying! But I know you can do more. I believe in you. Show me how far you can develop 🙂
I LOVE YOU.
This author is fairly positive that Cain would have chosen a different path if he were encouraged as opposed to ridiculed and chastised.
Oh, well I guess that didn’t happen…
Job is even more telling because he was a devout follower that Jehova bragged about while hanging with the bad boy Satan.
Even though Satan is a Sanskrit term for knowledge (which is evil how?).
Oh that’s a conversation down another rabbit hole on another day because we’ve already shocked some of your noodles too much as it is.
In any case, let’s move on!
Satan suggests that Job will turn his back on the big man himself if he were to allow the devout follower to suffer some outlandish punishments.
So how does the all-good, all-knowing, and omnipotent deity called Jehova respond to the gnat buzzing around his ear?
He goes along with the plan and tests Job by taking damn near everything from him.
Home, family, livestock, property, money, and friends.
Who (the last mentioned) actually went out of their way to kick the man while he was already down by ridiculing him for being so wicked…
Even though Job was a devout follower? I mean – he followed Jehova’s word more so than any in his little crumbling world.
So what’s the deal?
This author doesn’t know, although he does know (having been raised by monsters) that no loving parent would EVER subject their offspring to cruel and unusual punishments in order to satiate their parental egos.
Deity, human, monkey, whatever…
Causing harm is wrong.
End of story.
Don’t make excuses like:
That just goes to show how one can stay true to the lord when they’re suffering so much. A true test of faith!
No way, Jose!
This author hopes the reader understands that lowering one’s boundaries to the point another being can ravage one’s life wholeheartedly does not constitute a healthy and balanced relationship in which all parties can rise together.
In fact, it just opens one to abuse. Accepting it at the very least.
After all, does anyone else find it strange that Jehova constantly threatens to send his own creations (children) to Hell for eternity if they aren’t pleased being on their knees?
Oh and by the way, this is Hell.
Well kind of because Hell has taken many forms since the dawn of mythology.
It never had the fire and brimstone most know it to have nowadays, and we should all give a round of applause for Dante Alighieri for helping out with that…
Hel (Nordic version) used to be a place where the dead chilled once they passed.
But then again, that doesn’t sound as fun as the daycare the Christian daddy wants to send his disobedient little ones.
The Nords kept things fairly simple with three realms: Asgard, Midgard, and Hel.
Oh but Christianity has Heaven, Earth, and Hell!
That’s right, although its versions came at a much later date from when numerous cultures from around the world developed their own take on the tree of life and death alike.
But isn’t this all just a bunch of BS our ancestors made to describe the universe?
Because I said so.
Nah, just kidding. But in all seriousness divinity comes from the same source, much like the internet containing all types of information that flows both in and out of the observer simultaneously.
No two phones are the same – take Apple vs Android (don’t worry, we’re still on target).
Both utilize different operating systems (programming).
Yet either has access to an unseen force that holds any and all information one could dream up.
This sounds familiar, and it should because it is.
You see, humans are programmed from birth to accept a set of cultural norms and values that typically support the survival and success of the group.
Why else do you think religion and spirituality sprung from Mother Earth like any other flower or tree?
Simply because our ancestors were connecting with higher forms of consciousness (aka divinity) by taking psychedelic trips in caves and temples throughout the ages.
Did you know the entire Egyptian Book of the Dead was written from documenting the experiences of priests who were tripping more so than Gene Wilder in Willy Wonka?
So if one adds a cultural filter or lens to the mix, deity will vary in appearance.
Likewise 4Chan and Reddit are very different places that offer different services.
Or better yet, Chrome – Explorer – Safari – & Firefox.
What do they have in common?
Oh that’s right, they all provide access to the internet even though they are not the internet in and of itself.
A source of information resides beyond our fleshy bio-body suits, although it doesn’t care how you live your life because it simply exists.
However, it can look awfully welcoming or frightening depending on how one chooses to approach it.
Why? Because it’s everything and nothing simultaneously.
But can you see how damaging it is to scare people into following a deity that doesn’t have their best interests in mind?
Worship me because I made you for that reason, although I’ll discard you without a second thought if you choose to rebel against me.
Doesn’t sound very loving to this author – and he should know because he was raised by monsters.
HONOR THY MOTHER AND FATHER.
A.k.a. don’t question authority, regardless of how it treats those it was entrusted to care for.
So if you want to call yourself my dad, you’ll offer me protection and guidance for love and security to anchor themselves.
Otherwise if this is what you have in mind…
I’m gonna have to go no contact because abuse is wrong, no matter who or what serves it.
Our lives have value, and no parent would ever want us to forget that.
Ladies and gents, that whole shpeel in less than three minutes…
Take the Dante’s Inferno Quiz and see which level of Hell you’ll enter upon dying 😛
Comment below to share your result!
I’ll start 🙂
Featured Image: Team Jimmy Joe